Sword Art Online IN 5 MINUTES | Anime in Minutes

Sword Art Online IN 5 MINUTES | Anime in Minutes

Welcome to Sword Art Online ! Announcer: Sword Art Online is the greatest game ever! Kirito: This is the Greatest Game EVER! Announcer: You are now all trapped until someone completes a hundred floors Kirito: Fuck Announcer: Haha, most of you are actually guys! Oh and if you die in here you die in real life. *panic ensues* Kirito: YOU, come with me! I need a comedic sidekick! Klein: Actually I think I can be an interesting character audiences would like to see more of- SHUT UP Klein, come back when you’re a Main Character™! ಥ_ಥ (#saveKlein) Announcer: 2 Months have passed and 2,000 people have died. Generic Knight: Too many people have died! So your only objective of this raid is DON’T DIE! Oh God, I’m dying. Kirito: Drink the potion. Generic Knight: This is it, I can tell this is the end! Kirito: DRINK the goddamn potion! Generic Knight: Just tell my family I love them Kirito: WILL YOU JUST DRINK THE POTION ALREADY?! bleh WHY DIDN’T YOU DRINK THE POTION?! Screw it, I’ll do it myself. Fangirl: Oh my God, I want his babies! Bystander: Who the hell is he? Kirito: I’m the Black Swordsman. Guts: No, you’re fuckin not. Rosalia Bitch: How the hell did he get so Overpowered™?! Kirito: psh I’m not Overpowered™! FUCK OUTPLAYED MLG 2GUD (WOMBO COMBO) PRESS F (HAPPY FEET) 4v1 (IT AIN’T FALCO!) REVERSE GANK [Mechanical God] Kirito: Now I just need to find my generic love interest! Kirito: Are you the right one? Harem Victim: I guess I could- *Blood-curdling scream* Ped-ito: Are you the right one? Harem Victim #2: I’m like 12! Kirito: Are YOU the right one? Harem Victim #3: I’m as useless as a hedgehog in a condom factory! Kirito: How about you Tits McGee? Asundere: It’s not like I like you or anything you idiot BAKA! Kirito: Perfect Hi! Asuna: HI! Kirito: Wanna get married? Asuna: OK! Kirito: Wanna have sex? Ass-una: OK! (Underage Sex ensues) Asuna: Does this mean we can have children now? Kirito: GOD, I hope not. Asuna: Kirito, look what I found! Kirito: You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me. Asuna: Can we keep it? Kirito: No Asuna: But I want ooonnneee! Kirito: NO Asuna: Pleeeeeeeease Kiri-no: NO! Asuna: I’m not having sex with you for a month! Kirito: FINE If you promise to feed it properly and take it for walks. Satan: Are you my mama and papa? Asuna: YES! Kirito: NOOO!! Can we just go back to showing me being Overpowered™? Oh, so apparently I can dual-wield now! Harem Victim #5: Hey, how is that fair- Kirito: SHUT UP, Klein! Come back when you’re a Main Character™! ಥ_ಥ (RIP Klein. You were the MC we needed, but not the one we deserved) Now no one can beat me at this game! Heathcliff: I’mma let you finish Kirito but, I AM THE GREATEST SAO PLAYER (cheater) OF ALLLLL TIME! Kirito: YOU WANNA GO? FIGHT ME IRL BRO! fuck Announcer: Heathcliff WIN! Kirito: HAX! I call hax! Not-Kayaba-Akihiko: What? Kirito: You’re Kayaba Akihiko aren’t you? Definitely-Not-Akihiko: What are you talking about? Kirito: Obviously no one else can beat me at this game! Clearly not Kayaba Akihiko: I commend you for figuring out the truth. NOW FIGHT ME! Kirito: Oh, shit, seriously? I was just talking out of my ass! Kayaba Akihiko: Whoopsie Daisy! Kirito: Asuna, WHYYYYYY?!?! Asuna: Because that’s the only useful thing I’m ever gonna do… (Oops) Kirito: I’M STILL GONNA DIE YOU STUPID BITCH! Now you die. HAX MODE ON! What? (penetration) Kayaba Akihiko: This doesn’t even make sense…! Kirito: gg no re Kayaba Akihiko: Congratulations on beating the game. Kirito: So, how come you wanted to trap thousands of people in this game? Pfft I dunno. Kirito: Seems legit. Asuna: I’m gonna blow you so hard when we get out of here! Kirito: OK! WAKE UP BITCH YOU OWE ME A BLOWJOB! Generic Villian: I’m afraid she’s not going to wake up… Kirito: Who are you? Generic Pedo: I’m the new bad guy of this arc
who’s going to marry this girl! Hahahahaha! Kirito: Alright PedoMcRapeFace, have fun getting dead fished for the rest of your life. Harem Victim #5: Hi, I’m Incest! Kirito: Sorry Incest, I’m not really interested right now. What am I supposed to do now? Agil: Have you heard?
There’s a new RPG out! Kirito: Now’s not the time for games! I have to figure out a way to save Asun- HOLY SHIT YOU CAN FLY? I’M SO FUCKING ON THIS! Agil: What about saving Asuna? Kirito: Saving who? Incest: You have black hair and
you’re really good at video games! Just like my brother! Kirito: That very big breasts! Just like my sister! Incest: Did I ever tell you I was in love with my brother? Kirito: Wow It’d sure suck if I was your brother! Incest: YOU’RE MY BROTHER?! Kirito: I’M YOUR BROTHER?! FUCK! FUCK! I CAN’T BELIEVE I FELL IN LOVE WITH MY BROTHER. Kirito: Sugu (Incest), wait! You still might have a chance with me! Incest: I’m instantly over it. Let’s play more video games! Incest: This final boss is impossible to beat! Kirito: HA! Who the hell do you think I am? I’m Kirito- AHHHHHHHHHHHH *GANKED* Alright, well I guess 2nd time’s a charm. Incest: This time with the power of FRIENDSHIP! Random Loser: I’m actually just a pointless character (Darude Sandstorm) Kirito: Alright, I’m through! Now to get you out! Asuna: How do you plan to get us out? Kirito: By ripping off Berserk. *Kirito about to pre* GRIFFITHHHHHHH- Oh you’re here again. Wait, how are you even here?! Ghost Kayaba: Pffft I dunno. Kirito: Seems legit HAX MODE ON What? Wat? How? Kayaba KAYABA! FINAL BATTLE *tink* *dink* *cough* So this is it. I’ve saved my girl, defeated the bad guy, and escaped the game after
living 2 years of a torturous life in it. I guess there’s only one more thing to do… (live a normal life?) PLAY SWORD ART ONLINE AGAIN! Some Guy: Yeah! *Harem Laugh* THE END

100 thoughts on “Sword Art Online IN 5 MINUTES | Anime in Minutes”

  1. Dude is it just me or does SAO just seem like it's getting shittier and shittier each episode. Like the shit doesn't even make sense in there. Not to mention to horrible design.

  2. “I saved the my girl, defeated the bad guy…escaped the game after spending two torturous years of my life. I guess there’s only one more thing to do…PLAY SWORD ART ONLINE AGAIN”

  3. Kirito: Now it's no time for games… I gotta find a way to say asuna.. Holy shit you can fly I'm so fucking on this
    Agil:What about saving asuna
    K: Saving who?
    I died literally


  5. ok is it just me or did the date say 2022, and that was 2 years later and that would mean that it was 2020 when the entire thing happened????????or am i just going crazy

  6. Asuna: This is the only useful thing I can do

    Kirito: I'm still going to die you stupid b××ch

    and klein still had the revival item

  7. "Obviously no one else can beat me at this game"

    "I commend you for figuring out the truth, now fight me!"

    But like, that's literally what happened lmao

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